I bear my soul through music
And never know
Who has known me.

Awaken

Awaken my ears, awaken my mind
Show me how to hear
Show me how to find
True freedom.

To understand music...

Look! I see so clearly
Now and then
The thing that I am striving
So to be - 
I hear a greatness
Trickling deep inside
Like of that of water -
But behind the trickling
Is hiding
A giant fountain -
Waiting to spring forth
And building pressure,
Every moment -
Do not hesitate much longer,
Oh ye rocks - Ye shall give way!
These blocks shall be removed
With one fell sweep
And then the flow of understanding
Will spring forth
Like a great river falls,
In beauty everlasting.

Strivings of a Pianist

I just found this poem in an old google document I had...


New, New, New
Life brings
Something New

Life turns
Away from the old
And into something
Fresh

Change,
Must happen
Inside
Outside
Everywhere

I cannot move
Without changing
I cannot live
The same way
anymore
Everything
Must change.

I cannot let go
totally yet
But I am yearning to
Living to
I'd die to
Change into something
Better

I must become
Different
I must become
Stronger
Calmer
Wiser

I musn't be
Afraid
Anymore
I must know
That all will be
Alright

I must know
All so well
That nothing
Can fail
I must know
that
All is well.

I must pray
For God to help me
Find a way
To understand my music
So completely
So entirely
Inside out
and Upside down
I must not give up
I must not give in
To discouragement

I must continue growing
Continue learning
Continue knowing
And finding out the truth
Of everything
In everything
And about everything.

I must find out
the truth in sound
The information contained therein
I must find out the truth
About technique
The motions that will make me
finished
The restraint
That will make me
Free

I must not give in
I must continue
I must continue growing
Until I find I know
All that I need
to Play
And not be
Afraid

I cannot be afraid anymore
I cannot be
I must live
and not be afraid
of dying
I must work
And not be afraid of trying
and Failing

I must not fail
But I must continue
Until I succeed
I do not care how long
I cannot give up
I cannot give in
I must live
I must achieve this

I must play piano.
I am a pianist. 

January 5 2008

Each step

One day at a time
We take it this way
And so it goes
In life, in music, in art
And every other place
Day by day
We make our way
We shape our paths
Through little steps
Which don't seem much
But every one
Has its own
Direction
And thus they must
Have an effect.

I see the road ahead,
But not too far
Where it shall lead
I do not know
And yet I want to go
Along this road
Because it seems
To beckon me
With hopes
And not because I know
Just what the walk will be
How long or steep --
But I feel one day
I'll find myself
Somewhere
Along this path
And it will suddenly hit me
That I have been
Made free.